Here are two stories. Which do you think is true?
Once upon a time, there was a woman who moved to a new state with her husband and child, found herself separated within months, and became a single parent. After their divorce, she was fired and diagnosed with cancer. Almost broke, she tried to sell her home but had no offers. She found love again, only to lose her partner and best friend to cancer in the same year. Cancer reappeared in her life again, and she ended up having a double mastectomy over the course of two years. She remains single, longing for love.
Once upon a time, there was a woman who moved to a new state and reinvented herself. After living the life others expected her to, she decided to be her authentic self.
This “rebranding” included a divorce, a new career, and a deeper dive into spirituality. She turned her childhood passion, reading tarot cards, into an income and invested time studying with her favorite authors. Life threw her many devastating curveballs (including loss and a life-threatening illness); however, she learned to focus on the lessons, opportunities, and power gained from each traumatic event and found herself joyfully living the life of her dreams. To this day, she refuses to “settle.”
Both stories are “my stories.” My story could read like a dramatic horror novel – or a “comeuppance” depending on how I choose to view (and tell) my story.
If there is anything I’ve learned in my (almost) 60 years on this planet is how to turn my pain and trauma into growth and healing for myself and others.
One trick I have used over the years I’d like to share with you.
A Ritual to Banish & Heal
- Black Candle: Provides protection and heals dark wounds.
If you are moving through an experience with a person, a health opportunity, or even a situation haunting you from your past, schedule time to sit in ritual undisturbed. Write to your situation as if it were a person (or write to the person). In your letter, express your feelings, fears, disappointments, expectations, and anything you want to add.
Light your black candle and burn your letter. Ask the flame to consume your wounds and make space for healing. As the ashes fall, pick some up with your thumb, and wipe it on your third eye, feeling, sensing, and imagining yourself healed and whole.
Keep in mind that you choose whether or not your wounds are growth opportunities or if the sympathy you get from retelling your tragedy is the “currency” you desire.
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You Are Loved!